An eye-opening roommate
A summer student shifted my ideas about Muslim culture
When it comes to roommates, I’ve had plenty. As the landlady over the past 40 years, I’ve lived with students from Japan, Korea, Africa, and elsewhere. They helped pay my bills, but they also taught me a lot about other countries, their cultures and habits. In the end, I find this best of all.
My most recent roomie is a case in point. Zainab saw my advertisement in a university listing and called me from her school in Newfoundland. We switched to Facetime, and there she was: an international master’s student and lively young woman with a great smile. We quickly agreed that she would move in for three months this summer.
I prepared to pick her up at the airport on a cold and windy May evening. “How will I recognize you?” I asked. She sent me a photo dressed from head to toe in a black abaya (a robe-like dress). Her hair was covered by a hijab (a head covering that covers all of a woman’s hair); her lower face covered by a niqab. Only her eyes were visible.
I have friends from many cultures but none of them were practicing Muslim women. I’ve seen women completely covered, with only their eyes showing, a few times in my life. I will be honest: I was shocked.
The feeling did not last long. I quickly realized that my new roomie was her own person. She showed up at the airport with one small bag, which she tossed into the back seat. She removed her niqab and chatted away.
Once she was familiar with Albertans, she often made the choice to remove the niqab. “When I first got to Edmonton, I didn’t know what kind of people I would meet here,” she told me. “I felt safer wearing my niqab. Soon, I got to know there are good people here, very welcoming to me. I felt comfortable without wearing it.” She explained that it was entirely her choice.
A master’s student with a summer research placement at MacEwan University, Zainab loves to travel. Banff was on her wish list of places to visit. I arranged to drive her and her school friend, a scholar from India on a summer program, to Banff and back. In one day!
Turns out that, whether they are from Canada, India, or Saudi Arabia, young women are the same… They love selfies. They took hundreds of shots by lakes, rivers, and craggy peaks. They weren’t impressed by Banff itself. “Too many tourists,” they said. But our spectacular Rocky Mountains won them over.
Since this whirlwind trip, we have visited Elk Island National Park and Pigeon Lake Village. With friends, she explored the Edmonton Art Gallery, Royal Alberta Museum, Muttart Conservatory, and (of course) West Edmonton Mall.
I have learned that my practicing Muslim roomie is a vivacious person who lives life with an open mind. She shared her faith and its customs. She listened to me talking about my practice of Buddhism. Her open mind encouraged me to open my own.
My summer roommate has been a welcome guest. She cooked many tasty Indian-style meals for me. She also taught me to let go of my preconceived notions about life as a Muslim woman.
Zainab’s family is close; so is mine. She seeks knowledge; so do I. She likes ice cream; so do I.
Friendship and respect are important qualities in life. I am grateful to have spent three months with my new acquaintance. We are different in age and culture, but entirely the same on a friendship level. I look forward to hearing about her adventures as a student and a traveller.
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